14 Things You Need to Immediately Ask Your Therapist

You likely have a lot to unpack during your therapy sessions—that is why you go! But have you ever thought about flipping the script and asking your therapist a few questions rather than just answering all of theirs? Therapist Jeff Guenther suggests that everyone ask their therapist these essential questions so they can deepen their understanding and maximize the benefits of therapy. These questions could take your sessions to the next level, empowering you and giving you even more insight into your mental health journey with your therapist by your side.

Note: The content of this article is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. Always consult with a qualified professional for advice tailored to your individual circumstances.

How Do You Decide On The Techniques You Use In Our Sessions?

If you ask your therapist, “How do you decide on the techniques you use in our sessions?” it can give you insight into their therapeutic approach and the reasons behind the methods they choose. Each therapist has a unique style and may draw from various schools of thought, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy, psychodynamic approaches, or mindfulness practices. Understanding their decision-making process can help you feel more engaged and informed about your treatment.

Which Interventions Do You Think Work Best On Me?

This question can help you better understand yourself and your progress and the strategies that resonate most with you. Therapists can use different techniques tailored to individual clients, and this question encourages them to reflect on their specific responses and experiences. By talking about the particularly effective interventions for you, you can see patterns that highlight your strengths and areas for growth.

What Topic/Issue Do You Think I’m Most Defensive About?

Asking your therapist, “What topic or issue do you think I’m most defensive about?” might give you valuable information about your emotional triggers and behavior. Defensiveness sometimes serves as a protective mechanism from within, protecting us from discomfort. By identifying these areas, you and your therapist can explore why certain topics evoke strong reactions and work toward understanding the underlying feelings at play.

When Do You Think We Will Reach Our Goal With Our Sessions?

Asking this question can help you clarify your expectations and gain a sense of direction in your journey with your therapist. Understanding the timeline for your progress lets both you and your therapist assess the effectiveness of the strategies being used between you two. It can also encourage an open discussion about your goals, whether they are short-term or long-term, and helps you stay motivated and focused.

Do You See Any Mental/Emotional Patterns In My Behavior?

If you ask your therapist, “Do you see any mental or emotional patterns in my behavior?” it allows you to explore your habits and reactions in different situations more deeply. Identifying these patterns can give you important insights into how you respond to stress, relationships, and personal challenges. This question also encourages your therapist to share their observations and helps you recognize recurring themes in your life that you might not be aware of.

Is There Anything You Wish I Would Do Differently Between Our Sessions?

This is a question that can lead to self-realizations and feedback that takes your healing to a new level. It encourages your therapist to share their own thoughts on how you can apply what you’ve learned during sessions to your daily life. It opens the door for discussion about practical strategies, exercises, or reflections that could reinforce your progress and make your therapists job easier. If you’re open to this feedback, you show them a commitment to your growth and the process.

Who In My Life Do You Think Has The Most Negative Impact On My Mental Health?

Asking your therapist this question can help you understand from their perspective who they think adds more negative qualities to your life than positive ones. This person genuinely wants the best for you and to see you thrive, so their perspective on this matter is important. By opening a conversation on this topic, you can work with your therapist to come up with strategies for avoiding negative influences.

What About The Most Positive Impact On My Mental Health?

This is the same as the last question but with opposite polarity. You should ask your therapist, “Who in my life do you think has the most positive impact on my mental health?”. Not only does it help you recognize the people who have been positively enforcing factors in your life, but you can learn to have a new appreciation for them and the value they add to your life. By figuring out who these supportive people are in your life, you can reinforce those connections and foster growth in them.

Are There Any Resources You Recommend For Someone With My Issues?

This question can lead to discussions about books, articles, podcasts, or support groups that align with your specific challenges and that can help you grow. When you ask for these resources not only are you helping yourself, but you demonstrate an active and engaged approach to your mental health journey. Your therapist can provide recommendations that complement your therapy and reinforce the work you’ve been doing together.

How Do You Take Care Of Your Own Mental Health As A Therapist

Asking your therapist, “How do you take care of your own mental health as a therapist?” can humanize the relationship you have with them and even build a sense of connection. It invites your therapist to share their own coping strategies and self-care practices and gives you a look into how they manage the emotional demands of life. Knowing their approach can inspire you to consider your own self-care routines and the importance of maintaining your mental well-being.

Can You Tell Me About A Situation Where You Felt Proud Of Me?

This is a question that can put a lot of the work you’ve been doing into perspective because so often we overlook our own progress. Hearing your therapist’s perspective on your accomplishments can boost your confidence and motivation, reminding you of the progress you’ve made. It also encourages you to recognize your own achievements and resilience, which can help you feel more empowered and excited to keep going.

Are My Problems More Interesting Than The Rest Of Your Caseload?!

This question may seem humorous, but it can also spark a deeper conversation about your unique challenges. Your therapist can share how they view your journey in the context of their broader practice, highlighting that every person brings their own complexities and problems. This can help normalize your experiences, showing you that while your issues may feel difficult and overwhelming, you are not alone.

What do you think I am struggling with the most?

Asking your therapist directly what they believe you are struggling with the most can be eye-opening. While you may think one issue is the most important, you may be surprised to find that a different thing should really be your focus. While your therapist may never flat-out tell you your biggest issue, they likely will if you ask! This direct line of conversation will help your sessions be more focused and direct.

Why do you want to be a therapist?

What motivates your therapist? Are they interested in helping others find mental clarity, or are they just in it for the money? Perhaps their mother was a therapist, and they simply followed in her footsteps. The reason your therapist chose their profession may make you see them and their advice in a different light. You will probably be surprised by their answer no matter what they say.

This article was inspired by the Instagram account of therapist Jeff Guenther.