15 Signs Your Partner Is Cheating On You – Financially

Have you ever heard of financial infidelity? It’s when partners hide, lie about, or mismanage money in ways that betray trust in the relationship. It may not be a romantic love affair, but it can feel like cheating in a whole new way.

Maybe it’s a husband stashing away cash or a wife splurging on a designer dress without saying a word. It’s not always about the amount but the secrecy of the spending and money habits that hurt the most. Discovering financial infidelity can be tough, but recognizing it is the first step toward rebuilding trust. Look over these signs that financial cheating might be happening in your relationship. Then, be prepared to make some changes!

Longer Hours

Does your partner suddenly work longer hours but still bring home the same amount of pay? This can be a sign of an affair, or it could be him hiding the bonus checks he’s been getting from his boss.

Regardless, working longer hours for the same pay is never a good look. It’s a classic sign that something isn’t quite what it should be. Of course, work load is up and down for most of us, but make sure that there is nothing behind the longer hours.

Sudden Budget Cuts

Let’s say your partner has had the exact same job for 20 years, with the same steady paycheck year after year. All of a sudden, your partner starts bringing home less money. They tell you that you have to cut down on groceries and clothes.

The budget cuts never come with an explanation. They just are there. In most cases, a budget cut that makes no sense and comes without warning is a sign of financial infidelity. You have to ask where that money goes.

Missing Valuables

This is a sign that tends to walk the line between financial infidelity and theft. Did you notice that your gold rings are vanishing? Has money started to disappear from your wallet magically?

If your spouse keeps trying to call you crazy, it could be that your spouse has taken them and sold them for cash. Why? Well, he may have been hiding a habit or a financially devastating secret.

Lies About Income

Your spouse claimed he makes a modest income. Then, you saw his paycheck and it’s off by several thousand dollars…maybe more. You found out he had a massive investment portfolio he never told you about. What’s going on?

Well, if he’s been telling you that he’s on the struggle bus, it’s a matter of financial infidelity.

Gifts That Never Arrive

Did your partner claim that they bought you a gift when you saw a suspicious receipt? Did that gift ever arrive? If it didn’t, you have to ask why.

Financial infidelity is often found alongside traditional infidelity. Those gifts? They probably went to someone else when they should have gone to you.

Double Standards

Do the rules that apply to your spouse not apply to you? For example, if you have a joint bank account, does your spouse spend money from it freely while demanding you ask for permission?

Those double-standards are a sign that something isn’t right with your spending as a couple. It signifies that your partner is controlling your finances or hiding something from you. Either way, it’s a bad sign.

Sign It!

If you notice this sign, a major alarm bell should ring in your mind. Extremely dishonest spouses might pressure you to sign contracts and papers without reading them, or they may try to pressure you into signing something that would put you at a major disadvantage.

If you notice this pattern (or worse, discover your “signature” on papers you never saw), it’s time to divorce your partner. Nothing good will come of this.

Surprise Cards

Be very, very worried if you start seeing new credit cards your partner never told you about in their wallet. Be even more worried if you find bank cards or debit cards.

A healthy couple will be open about the credit lines they have. If your spouse isn’t honest with you or doesn’t talk to you about this, you have to wonder why.

Tight Lips

When you ask your spouse about certain bills or try to see what’s going on with his bank account, does he refuse to let you see anything? Do you find yourself having to spy on your spouse just to find out your financial situation?

If so, you should be worried. There’s a reason he’s being so secretive about his money and this is often a sign that something sketchy is going on. You have a right to know about your family’s finances.

Wonky IRS Filings

This is a major red flag that you should be aware of. Compare your tax filings to what your spouse has told you. Do they match up? If they don’t, you might have a problem far worse than financial infidelity or money going to someone else.

Any time you find an IRS filing that doesn’t look quite right, you should have a frank discussion with your partner. The same could be said of audits. This could be a sign of tax fraud.

Hidden Addresses

Though rare, some women find out about financial infidelity as a result of discovering a hidden address linked to their spouse. More often than not, this address is used to hide other goods or money. However, it can also be used to hide a second family.

If you find something along these lines, you might need to talk with a lawyer. Chances are, it will get ugly.

Strange Calls

Perhaps one of the most common reasons why spouses find out about hidden financial issues deals with debt collectors. If you start getting strange phone calls from debt collectors, one of three things could be happening.

It could be a debt that you’re already aware of. However, it could be a debt your husband hid from you or a scam caller. Regardless, it’s often a sign that you need to have a heart-to-heart with your spouse.

High-Controlling

People engaging in financial infidelity often tend to be highly controlling of money. For instance, you may find them counting every penny they spend, while only a few months ago, they never seemed to worry about their expenses. If this is the case, there’s probably something fishy.

Random Overspending

This can also be considered a form of financial infidelity. While everyone should be able to make small purchases without having to ask their partner for permission, this cannot be the case for expenses of thousands of dollars. Has your partner made a massive purchase without telling you anything but using your common funds?

Random Cash

Have you spotted your partner with cash lately? If he was the type of person who used his card for everything and is now bringing cash whenever he goes, chances are he may be hiding something. Why? Your husband probably knows that you have access to his expenses if you decide to check his card. This means he will have to use cash whenever he wants to buy something behind your back.